According to my sister, who met her husband online more than five years ago, in order to be successful at online dating, you have to know the secret, “and that secret” says my sister, “is the right attitude, the right intentions and the right strategy.”
This is how the conversation began over a glass of iced tea when I shared with my sister that I was tired of being single and was ready to get married again, which would be a second time for me.
This was when my sister shared with me the secret rituals of online dating. She continued by informing me that first and foremost, I can’t look at online dating as a means to finding a husband, but to instead view it as a way to meet and converse with interesting people and have tons and tons of fun.
The biggest mistake women make besides giving up hope that they will ever meet that special man is expecting every man that they agree to meet will qualify as spousal material, which leads to major disappointments. Instead, the right attitude to possess is to view every date as a one-time only occurrence. Pretend that he is a passenger next to you on a flight from New York to Hawaii. Just enjoy the ride with no expectations.
My sister insists that having those goals in mind is a win-win scenario and that I am guaranteed to meet with success ten times out of ten if I adhere to that mentality. “It doesn’t matter if I’m sexually drawn to him or not, not in the beginning anyway” she insists, “You’re just there for the fun and the food.”
So as my sister continued lecturing to me, I asked her, “when will I meet my husband if all I’m doing is enjoying good food and good conversation?”
“That’s when it will happen,” she assured me, “when you’re just having fun. That is when your husband will arrive and not a minute sooner.”
In light of my conversation with my sister, I have decided to adhere to her advice and become an online-dating superstar. I’m planning to post my profile on three different websites: Match, Tangowire and POF. My goal is to have so much fun meeting and conversing with different people that I forget that I am actually seeking a husband. Finding a husband is a numbers game like anything else. The more you put yourself out there, the better your chances. I theorize that if I date a minimum of twice a month, eventually I will connect with the right soul and when that happens, marriage can’t be far behind.
As I think about the advice of my sister, I am reminded of my aunt who took a swimming class seven times before she learned to swim. And I asked her, “why did you take it so many times?”
Her answer. “I wanted to learn to swim.”
The moral of the story. If you want something, you keep at it until it happens or until you no longer want it.
And that’s a wrap.